It's Not All About You

When things go south, your response matters more than the problem.

Whether they are minor inconveniences or catastrophic disruptions, bad things happen every day.

• AirPods run out of batteries in the middle of a run.

• Mayonnaise drips off your burger and onto your shirt before a client meeting.

• The WiFi drops out right before an important Zoom call.

• Your printer ink unexpectedly runs dry when printing a presentation.

• A flat tire greets you as you get in your car to pick someone up at the airport.

In branded merchandise, a delayed shipment or disappearing stock can miss client events or threaten in-hands dates. Sometimes, a prospect suddenly disappears, even after great meetings, aligned expectations, pricing agreement, and a handshake.

As I wrote above, bad things happen. Some are small annoyances while others are legitimate issues, but they all share one thing in common: they were not specifically designed to be a personal affront to you. Yet, so often, that’s exactly how we take them.

Our species has a way of turning random, inconvenient moments into something that seems deliberate and, oftentimes, personal. The guy at Starbucks who bumped into you and launched your overpriced half-soy caramel macchiato across your shirt? Trust me, he didn’t wake up that morning plotting how he might ruin your shirt; he was just distracted. Similarly, the supplier who ran out of stock after confirming your order isn’t purposely trying to make you look foolish to your client. Even the prospect who ghosted you after you felt you had the sale is likely dealing with other things that keep them from communicating with you.

All this is frustrating, but it’s rarely, if ever, personal. Just like any situation, priorities shift, decisions happen behind the scenes, mistakes occur, inventory runs out, and things just change.

I suppose my point here is that the real problem isn’t what happened, it’s how quickly we internalize it and make it about us. And that moment where we take it personally is the moment we lose power over the one thing truly within our control: our response.

Getting cheesed off at the guy in Starbucks - who likely feels horrible about what happened - won’t fix your shirt. Blowing up at a customer service rep and blasting the supplier in the Promotional Products Professionals Facebook group won’t magically produce inventory that doesn’t exist. Hounding a prospect that ghosts you will not instantly put you back in favor. All these things simply drain your energy and make a bad situation worse.

A better approach is to pause for a moment, breathe, and shift from reaction to response. When something goes wrong, and it will, focus on what really matters:

• What’s the next best move to get my desired outcome?

• Who do I need to communicate with?

• How do I find a resolution rather than escalate?

In business, especially the branded merchandise industry, where timelines are tight and expectations are insanely high, things will go wrong. The only way to differentiate here is how you handle it: do you react emotionally or respond intentionally?

Trust me, over time, people will often forget about the problem, but they will definitely remember how you showed up when things didn’t go your way.

Bad things happen because, well, life. Remember that it’s not about you; it’s ultimately how you respond.